As the weekend approaches my personal sense of anxiety is increasing with each passing day…
I know that what I’m experiencing is totally normal and part of the ongoing circle of life, and yes deep-down I am truly happy for Zach to be leaving for University and the start of an amazing and life altering experience.
Our plan is to drive up the five plus hours to Montreal leaving mid-morning on Saturday so we can get up there in the middle of the afternoon and he can go get his student ID in prep for the move into residence on Sunday morning.
Since getting back from our Grand Tour Zach has been busy collecting and packing all of his books, and generally sorting out all the things that he wants to take with him to decorate his dorm room – yep there’s a lot!
The car will be totally full given what I’ve seen packed inside his bedroom. 🙂
Now, don’t get me wrong I’m totally thrilled for him but also feeling a personal sense of sadness and loss especially because we’re so close.
The big question for me is “where did the time go?”
I have such vivid memories from the moment that each of them were born and the way they looked at me when I first spoke to them…I could tell that they recognized my voice from all the stories I’d told them while my ex was pregnant with each of them.
As with most parents I fell in love the first instant that I saw them, held them and kissed them.
As you may have already guessed from reading some of my prior stories that he’s been ready for University since he was about three when he would sit quietly on the floor “reading”, or at least absorbing everything he viewed. From an early age he had an incredible memory for any topic that he took a shine to and so immersed himself in each of these things fully – oh, there were many phases!
Cars were his first love whereby he could name any make of car, by its badge and shape including the model. This phase was then followed by airplanes and airlines – I think the logos intrigued him with both cars and airlines. Of course, dinosaurs were a big favorite for a while, then as he got older he got into history (and still a big love for him), American Football, Basketball…yeah, now that I think about it it’s a long, long list! 🙂
He’s always had the ability to memorize almost anything. The penny dropped for me on our recent Grand Tour of Eastern Europe when I realized that he’s an expert with a map and navigating around a city. He only needed to get his directional bearings and where we were staying and he was ready to go. Easy peasy…
Not sure I can claim any of his brilliance, although feel like I’ve influenced him in many other ways.
We’ve had many conversations around self-belief, focus, perseverance and doing the things in life that make you passionate. I’ve noticed that as he’s matured he’s taken some of these fundamental topics on-board personally and as you saw with his high school graduation totally gone after his dreams.
I feel like I’ve been a good coach and role model to him in terms of getting him ready for this next phase of his life, less in an academic sense but more so around life skills and reinforcing the capabilities he’s going to need to live and thrive as an adult.
Personally, I think the harder transition will be for me and Sam rather than Zach, but the great news is that Sam and I will be able to create a deeper bond and hopefully get to a similar point as she embarks on her University career.
My goodness, I don’t even want to think about the moment when I have to drop her off and get her settled at her new University – a mere two short years away.
I’ll be a basket case by then, that I can guarantee. However, before I get too far ahead of myself I still have this week and weekend to get through without embarrassing either myself or Zach when I say goodbye.
As you can see I can be overly sentimental…one of my shortcomings so I’ve been told on more than one occasion, but there you have it.
I will miss him more than he’ll ever know…