These are the words to one of my favourite passages…master of my fate, the captain of my soul.

This incredibly powerful verse from the poet Poet William Ernest Henley (1849–1903), who understood the trials and tribulations of life as he battled Tuberculosis and ongoing health issues his entire life penned them in his seminal work – Invictus.

I am the master of my fate, the captain of my soul” means that it is up to me to determine what my future will bring.

It puts me in the drivers seat of my life… I take full responsibility for my life and everything that happens in it. There is no one to blame or finger point at if things go awry… nope just me! 🙂

To me this verse is both empowering and so incredibly true! Not just for me, but for each of us.

It wasn’t until later in my life that I finally figured out that I actually controlled my life, and that if I wanted to live life on my terms I could. I just needed to be courageous enough to do it!

We often feel under the control of others and not with the requisite freedoms to live life on our terms. This can as simple as feeling trapped in an unrewarding job, while knowing that you have to pay the bills and support your family.

It can eat away at you…. I’ve been there!

Perhaps it’s a maturity thing, or perhaps it’s an inflection point in our lives. What ever it is it makes us stop and gives us an “ah-ha” moment, when everything changes.

Some might categorise it as a mid-life crisis. But rather than see it in a negative light, it’s actually the opposite.

Self realization is never a bad thing. Allowing ourselves to step back on our life and reflect on your choices and direction, is in my mind mandatory!

For me, my inflection point came with the culmination of a few things. The loss of my dad, the unraveling of my marriage and a job that took me away from my kids without any opportunity to change.

Yeah, nothing good you would think…

However, what it allowed me to do was to understand that if anything was to change and me overcome my grief with these cumulative things then the only way forward was going to be dependant upon me.

I had to make the tough decisions to leave my unhealthy and unhappy marriage, to leave my toxic workplace and to choose a new path forward.

Funny how everything happens at once…

I also had to be strong enough to accept that I didn’t have a safety net and that with all of the change that was required would be on my shoulders alone to carry.

My first and paramount concern was for Zach and Sam and their emotional welfare as it would be as hard or harder on them…

I had realised that if I was unhappy then eventually this would impact them, if not already. So this became an imperative, not a nice to do.

There’s no question that this two year span was the culmination of many years of thought and consternation. It also served as the most challenging period in my life emotionally.

And that to be honest, is saying something…

The tricky part is that I was having to make these big decisions without guidance…literally following my gut or survival instinct.

I know this might sound a little flaky (now, now…that’s your outside voice) but when you open yourself up to the universe things happen.

Literally surrendering myself and following my heart allowed me to open up in a way that I didn’t expect. Things started to happen…

I decided to start my own business and not to rely on others to control me working life. This has been huge! The best part is that opportunities have found me and I couldn’t be happier nor less engaged.

Second I found my identity again…my mojo!

Gaining my personal confidence took time, but has been a cornerstone of my new life. Now I should warn you as this can be addictive in that what comes with this is a realization that you don’t need anyone in your life nor anyone to change you.

You are beautiful in your own and unique way.

This past year has seen a number of personal milestones that will continue to shape and evolve my life in the coming months and years.

It feels like I’m just getting started…

A rebirth if you will.

I can’t imagine my life if I hadn’t had the courage to take stock and listen to those powerful words “I am the master of my fate, the captain of my soul“.

No matter where you are in your life, these are words to live by. If nothing more than to listen to them and let them soak in…

Until next week